The Birth of Bridezilla

Oh I have been so slack about posting. This planning a wedding thing has become mildly consuming and I'm probably only about 1 or 2 tantrums away from becoming a full blown, stereotypical 'bridezilla'.

I spent yesterday shopping with my two bridesmaids for dresses and it was a lot more traumatic than I had hoped. They're both very strong willed people when it comes to what they want, and sadly for me, what they want it to look supremely hot in their bm dresses - not an unreasonable request I guess, although I do keep telling them that they're not allowed to look too good - I think all brides secretly want their bridal party to look just a little bit scruffy so as to make themselves look so much better.

The trouble is that when one of them is a busty size 10 (size 6 US) and the other is a not so busty size 6 (I think that's like a size 2 US) then, you start to run into problems with finding a dress that suits them both. What looks cute on one looks almost pornographic on the other. It can't be too low cut or one of them is all boobs, but it can't be too high cut because the other looks too flat chested. As i'm now aware, dress shopping is apparently all about how it makes your boobs look compared to the other bridesmaids. My sister very kindly offered to have a boob job (at my expense, of course) so as to look the same as my other bridesmaid. I politely declined, since I hadn't budgeted silicone boobs into my wedding expense list.

I took a little bit of evil delight in making them try on some hideously ugly dresses and pretending that I thought they were great, just to see them try to fake enthusiasm. I know, I'm cruel, but it starts to get pretty boring watching other people try on dresses while you wander around aimlessly looking at things covered in frills and tassels and beads. It's especially funny since we all have very different tastes in dresses, so they're inclined to believe that it's entirely possible I might want something like this for them on my big day.

It's going to be an interesting few months trying to keep everyone happy without going crazy.

A Toe Tale

I stubbed my toe on nothing and now it's a funny colour. By nothing I mean the floor and by funny colour I mean a strange kind of purpley/black. I thought it was broken, but now i think it's just angry with me for hurting it. It's not bruised, it has just turned purple with rage at me being so careless.

How do you stub your toe on the floor? With a clever kind of stumble-hop manoeuvre that is brought on by tripping over a laptop power cord and landing with pretty much all of your weight on your little toe while it's bent. I would be purple with rage too if someone did that to me.

The only good thing to come out of it is that I haven't been able to wear my shoes for a couple of days, so have been wearing some comfy thongs to work. That's flip-flops for all you sickos who think I'm talking about underwear. I'm not sure a g-string would be helpful in alleviating toe-pain, although to be fair, if you were wearing just a g-string you would probably be off your feet, which might be of some assistance.

Bald Mouse

I think I'm about to end up with a bald spot on my index finger. Bald of fingerprints, that is.

I've been using my laptop computer non-stop for the past few days and the stupid mousepad is wearing away the tip of my finger. It's actually beginning to cause me some serious discomfort. And now that I've noticed it, it seems even worse.

Damn you, laptop!!!! Why is this inter-web thingy so addictive?!!!