A Day Outdoors

Today I broke with all of my beliefs and did the unthinkable. Gardening.
We've lived here for about a year and a half and in all of that time, the total extent of our gardening work has been mowing the pitiful excuse for a lawn that we're trying not to grow in our backyard. And the last time we did that was the week that we moved in.

We got up reasonably early to get the deed done, and I started off by trimming some of the bushes along the front of the house. But the more I trimmed them, the more I realised they were just going to grow back again - so instead I pulled them out. It was a lot of hard work, but it was satisfying to know that I won't have to do it ever again. That's my kind of gardening.

And my reward for all of this hard work? I got so sunburnt on my back that I can't lie down without it stinging. This is why I don't believe in gardening. I find it hard to believe that people actually enjoy doing it. I think their enjoyment can probably, in most cases, be attributed to hallucinations brought on by sun-stroke.

I think I'll head over to the nursery tomorrow and see if they can sell me a couple of non-growing, non-dying, non-water-requiring plants. Do they exist?

I wonder if anyone would notice if the plants in our garden were all artificial...