Shampoo

Friday, July 02, 2010

Now that I’m under no obligation to post about anything in particular, I have a decent sort of list of things to talk about. Most important on that list is my new shampoo. (It’s clearly a very intellectual list.)


I was washing my hair the other night, and since I was using a new shampoo, I had a quick squiz at the bottle to see what amazing things it promised to do for my hair.


Like every woman, my bathroom is full of beauty products – shampoo and conditioners, deep conditioning treatments; toners and face wash; face masks and pore strips; moisturisers and eye creams – you name a part of my body and I’m sure that I have some product that promises to work miracles on it, making it firmer or tighter, more radiant and healthy or some such nonsense. They all promise to make a difference to how I feel about my looks. But never in my entire 28 years of using these products have I come across one that has promised that it will actually make my hair more appealing to other people – until now.


My local supermarket was out of my regular shampoo, so I bought Schwarzkopf Extra Care ‘Straight & Glossy’. This amazing product promises to tame rebellious, frizzy hair; repair and straighten hair structure for up to 48 hours; and the big one - ‘provide alluring shine’.

There it is - dot point number two
(Excuse my dodgy phone-photography)


That’s right – it promises that it will give my hair some kind of mystical shining property that will actually make it more attractive and tempting to other people. At least, that’s my read on what ‘alluring’ means. And a quick browse around the web seems to confirm that I’m right – about the word meaning, that is, not about the mystical powers of my shampoo.

Google Dictionary says:
Alluring
- Someone or something that is alluring is very attractive.

Princeton University Wordnet says:
Alluring - highly attractive and able to arouse hope or desire

and Wiktionary says:
Allure
- The power to attract, entice; the quality causing attraction.


So essentially, this shampoo is promising me that if I use it, it will make my hair so shiny that suddenly men (and possibly women) everywhere will begin to look at me in a new way. My once dull hair will shimmer with wondrous shininess and people will find themselves suddenly drawn to me in a way that leaves them full of hope and desire.



Obviously, this leaves me with a few questions.

First off, do men really find shiny hair that appealing? Could the shine level of my hair really impede my ability to find a mate?

Secondly, is it possible that any product can actually make you more attractive to the opposite sex?In the end, you still look exactly the same, only slightly firmer, less wrinkly or with shinier hair.

And last of all - what am I doing wrong here? Because since washing my hair on Wednesday, I haven’t had a single person tell me how alluring I suddenly look or try to chat me up while surreptitiously attempting to stroke my hair. Maybe I need to flip my hair around more or something, like I’m in a hair care commercial.

Yes, that must be it.

2 comments:

Tyge said...

I use Schwarzkopf's Got2b styling gel in the yellow tube. One time the store was out of it, so I bought Schwarzkopf's black bottle of "magnetik" gel with pheromones, which promised to give me "game" with the ladies.

I'm tempted to sue them for false advertising.

torrygirl said...

Did it actually say game with 'the ladies'? Because calling women 'the ladies' is a pretty sure sign it's not gonna work.

Maybe when they said you'd have 'game' they meant scrabble?

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